Stereotypes, Patronus' and Hysterics
by Fezzes at 221b
Summary: Fred II is glad to be going back to Hogwarts or many reasons, including seeing his best friend Hayley Walters. But, as they learn to cast patronus' all is not what it seems...
1. Chapter 1

Fred Weasely was pretty damned excited about going back to Hogwarts, Wizarding School of Magic.

There were various reasons, including seeing his dad's brother's ghost, his best friend, the American girl, Hayley and pranks. Of course.

Him and Fred, his uncle who died before he was born, would plan pranks out and him and Hayley would set them up. The three of them had the best reputation in the school. Fred I who was one of the best pranksters since the Marauders, forty or so years ago. His uncle was the son of their leader, James Potter.

The second Fred stepped on the train, he found Hayley talking with his cousins, Teddy, Rose, Albus and James. They were all squashed in one compartment, talking, laughing and sharing cookies and Chocolate Frogs.

Once they arrived at Hogwarts, they were shown to the Great Hall, where James was put in Griffindor.

Fred I showed up by walking through Hayley, who screamed, threw a chip at him which flew through him and landed on the Ravenclaw table. They immediately all stopped laughing and Hayley turned around and stared at the opposite wall with the most nonchalant face she could muster.

Three days later, they were walking to Defence Against The Dark Arts lesson with Professor Weasely.

The first thing he did was promise his nephew that if he ever tried pranking him in class, they would be picking out Puking Pastilles from their food for the next year.

Then, as an afterthought, he said he would tell their parents.

"Right, today, we will be doing Patronus'." there was mixture of groans and 'yes's'

Fred II fist-pumped. Hayley groaned.

"Think of the happiest memory you can and focus all the happiness into one spell. _Expecto Patronum_!" A Jack Russell leapt out of the end of his wand and bounced around the room, glowing happily.

"This spell will fend off Dementors, which by the way, suck and are pretty horrible. If you encounter a Dementor, cast this spell, and when you're safe, eat a load of chocolate. Dementors make all your saddest and worst memories surface. So Patronus' fend them off."

Soon the room was full of groans, cheering and '_Expecto Patronum_, god damnit!"

Hayley stood next Fred, watching his wolf silently howl at other students.

"C'mon it isn't that hard. Happy things!" encouraged Fred.

Hayley sighed. "I'm gunna get a stupid animal, like a rat or a tarantula."

"You don't know that. You could get something awesome like a giraffe."

"Its gunna be stupid." but she said '_Expecto Patronum_'

After a few tries, a white mist spun out of her wand and flew to the roof.

"Great. I don't have an animal. I have a blob. And it's scared of me!"

"Good, Hayley. Try harder, the animal should appear." called Prof. Weasely.

"Ugh." she muttered. She clenched her eyes shut and thought of one memory of her mother where they were out in London, buying her school supplies.

The class stopped and stared at the American girl, whose Patronus was swooping around the rafters.

"Wow. Hayley, look."

Hayley opened her eyes and started laughing hysterically.

It wasn't a tarantula or a rat.

Sadly, it wasn't a giraffe.

"It's a bald eagle. It's a freaking bald eagle."


	2. Chapter 2

Fred and Hayley stood next to each other watching their Patronus' play with each other. Hayley's hysterical laughter had passed thankfully. She laughed like a witch on crack.

After a few minutes, almost everyone had created one.

Suddenly there was cheering and clapping from the other side of the classroom.

Sam, one of their lesser friends ran up to them.

"You gotta see Ali's," he panted and turned and plunged into the crowd of students again.

Ali was a small, dirty-blonde haired Canadian. He was pretty quiet, but he was friends with almost everyone.

"I bet he gets the giraffe." muttered Hayley. Fred laughed.

They pushed through the mob and looked at the boy, completely dwarfed by the moose standing over him, the size of a car.

He looked pretty shocked.

The moose was as long as a seven-seater car and as tall as one and a half Ali's. Well, up to its head. Its antlers were just short of brushing the rafters.

"Nothing like sterotypes, my arse." Hayley muttered.


End file.
